Fan of the Week

Episode VII
RETURN OF THE NIGHT NEWS EDITOR
Injuries, near-riots, shutouts, triple plays...it's a period of deep sadness for the Hot Chasers. With the universe teetering on the precipice of turmoil and the Death Star closer to being built, can anything save the Chasers' season?
Yet not all is lost for Hurd's rebel scum. Though the Empire is ready to take over the universe (and the desk), all the Chasers need is a calm presence to lead the rebellion back.
In short, they need a long-lost Jedi Master. They need an Obi-Wan Kenobi. They need...
Master Don Peterson.
And thats why our beloved night editor-slash-slot guy-slash-proofer-slash-rimmer-slash-"Tedford is God" believer-slash-Jackass lover has been named the Hot Chasers' Fan of the Week.
"Yes, Dennis, it has been a long year for the Hot Chasers," Peterson said. "But I still think things are going pretty smoothly."
No matter how bad it may look for the Chasers, Peterson doesn't think the team is Bantha poo.
"Look, it could be worse," he said. "You could come to work each day like I do and have to listen to Dave Belli complain about the Giants and the 49ers and pretend to care. Now that's what I call rough. Losing a few softball games pales in comparison."
But for the Master and his apprentices, Corey and Emily, the universe is changing. There's a New Hope for them and they're not worried about the Empire Striking Back or the Revenge of the Sith. All they care about is the Return of the Hot Chasers and keeping the Phantoms from Menacing and the Clones from Attacking the sports desk.
"Whatever you say, Dennis," he responded when asked if he was honored to be named Fan of the Week.
He then grabbed his red pen, found a proof to read and began to swing the pen
around like it was a lightsaber. When he was done, he pulled his Jedi hood down over his head, turned to his followers on the desk and said:
"May the Slot be with you."